just be a total madlad

I feel like this is how Satan would operate.

Is god allowed to use the f word?

Okay, so just counting the deadly sins for simplicity. Brian thompson, per person who was denied healthcare, has committed treachery and greed

2023 saw uh group have 4700000 members. 32% of that (uhc’s denial rate) is 1504000 people denied healthcare. So already he’s sitting at 6000300 deadly sins per year. He was active as ceo from 2021. Totaling 24001200 so far

We can factor in sloth aswell, since the lazy prick instituted AI to review claims. This also falls under greed, since using AI was purely for profit. I couldn’t find good information on application rates, so I’ll assume 1 per year per person. The AI was instituded at the latest November 2023. So that’s a year of sloth and greed per claim, bringing in another 4.7 million each

He is now at 33401200 deadly sins

But what millionaire wouldn’t be complete without some wasteful gluttony? His networth at his time of dewth was 43000000. So he hoarded luxury money equivalent to that of 860 comfortable middle class annual salaries, so slap 859 lifetimes worth of gluttony on there

At death he had therefore committed approximately 33 402 060 deadly sins

Satan has found his legend

and if you collect all sins available you unlock the completionist trophy

Good point…

I’m told hell is merely the absence of God. Since I’ve never met God and the world is a dumpster fire perhaps I was a legend in the last life. 😎

[https://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=717#comic](https://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=717#comic)

Well, Hell isn’t really a biblical concept — it’s mentioned four times in the Bible and all four of them are wrong translations. So basically Hell was invented by the Church to instill fear and control people. Satan found his legends, and they’re all priests.

Satan is on to something, let’s hear him out. 😆

This does work in the pop-culture version of Christianity that many people think Christians believe.

However, the Bible gives no indication that this is how hell works at all. The lake of fire was invented specifically to punish Satan. He does not rule hell, he suffers.

Some Christians don’t believe in hell, but none of those that do think that Satan rules it, nor that those there will have any sort of culture about how great sin is.

I mean, if you ended up in hell, would you see Hitler as a legend for committing more sins? No, not really.

But from a pop culture standpoint, this is rather funny.

This reasoning is why things like zero tolerance policies are generally really stupid, and can actually lead to people violating the rules MORE than if the policy had reasonable tolerances.

E.g. thc blood limits in many countries are so restrictive that from a purely legal pov there is ZERO difference to you having smoked weed 2 days before you get in the car or 2 minutes before you get in the car, meaning that, again, ignoring ethics and speaking just purely legally, in those countries there is very little or no legal incentive to sober up before getting in the car, because thc blood levels drop so slow that you’d have to wait up to an entire week to drop into legal levels anyway. Wheras a more reasonable limit that you can actually achieve by sobering for a single night of sleep, there is a much stronger legal incentive to do so.

🫡

Heaven must be empty if a single sin means you’re guaranteed hell. Maybe you should be able to balance it out with good deeds?

One sin and a hundred good deeds sounds about equal.

Imagine if Hell is a casino and your sins in life are your gambling currency.

GOD: Go ahead and sin! As long as you’re sorry before you die, you get into heaven!

SATAN: WTF!

I mean really it’s God’s fault for deciding that a single sin damns you. Realistically if the bible were true we’d either all be going to hell due to good place rules, OR, we’d all be going to heaven because it’s literally as simple as saying you want jesus as your lord and savior. No real middle ground, and if anyone says purgatory be aware eternity of boredom and nothingness with a literal eternal reward vs eternal punishment is just hell-lite, and presents a situation where you cannot earn a redemption because your options are eternal punishment or eternal reward, so you won’t be doing it for the sake of being better.