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Thursday, 13 Mar 2025
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Social interaction is a skill that needs to be practiced.
People will do anything but accept that a teacher is Not a therapist..
How the fuck are they supposed to make you speak then?
when did we all decide that a little discomfort isn’t worth growing up and becoming a functional human being
Letting shy children be shy does nothing too. My solution: alcohol. That’s how I went from shy to life of the party. Start giving shy kids booze.
Issue in the phrasing: “make them”. Actively participating is pretty important for learning and yeah, some kids don’t like to talk and that can have a whole host of reasons that are here reduced to “shy”. Yeah, some are scared – the key is to work with kids and help them participate. Not judging kids for wrong answers, valuing input, having a positive relationship with students as a teacher so they don’t fear you, work in smaller groups you can “visit” and allow the silent kid to talk in a different environment and … alot more. Bottom line: when a kid isn’t talking, it IS our job to “make them” talk/participate but not as “forcing”, encouraging instead.
As a teacher: I am sorry, but if you’re in my class for 90 minutes and can’t get yourself to speak up for at least two sentences on your own, then yes, I am forced to make you talk for two sentences because I am supposed to grade you on participation.
“Dreading school” for being forced to speak for one single minute out of 90 does not mean that you’re shy, it means you might have an actual, serious problem with social interaction and could use some psychological help. It is one of the most normal things in adult life to just communicate with your peers and school is supposed to prepare you for that.
only thing is, coddling children constantly in this manner will just leave them ill-prepared for later life
it actually is the way to fix it
I always find it funny that the pills they use on this meme are 5mg oxycodone.
Putting them in small groups for class work with kids they are comfortable with is usually a good first step. I actually talk to my students who have trouble participating and ask what could help them. They know better than I do what works for them
Exposure therapy works, but it needs to be done in a gradual and thoughtful way otherwise it just reinforces the fear.
13 year old post
I used to avoid school and cut class, especially around presentation days, specifically because teachers would do this kind of thing. It was so damn ironic, because every semester I was asked at least once if my attendance was the result of bullying, always by a teacher who had forced me to do a presentation through a panic attack. And somehow not one of them could tell that the only ones I wanted to avoid were them.
I wish I had this problem. I was on a behavioral plan for years because I wouldn’t stop talking. Between that and my parents beating the shit out of me, I still feel like I’ll be punished for speaking unless spoken to as a 27 year old.
I don’t know what I hate more being put into groups with kids I don’t like or having to pick groups in classroom full of kids I don’t know
I know OP’s take is wrong, but actually the “forcing” part is the issue, teachers should encourage the shy kids and reward them not straight up push them in awkward situations when they are not mentally ready.
As soon as I could I skipped those classes but all those moments never made me stronger, they just made me further realize that I wasn’t functional like everyone else and the way the teachers reacted to that made me feel that I had way less value than everyone else. Lots of therapy and self help got me to lean into my strengths. Those moments of forced speaking only set me back further.
It’s funny how many people in these comments are making it obvious they don’t understand how this feels.
The amount of people who have no idea what anxiety is or how to deal with it or have any reason to ever give medical advice is through the fucking roof.
Actually at that point you have to start asking what is going on at home? Because this helped me and I know it doesn’t help everyone but the ones it doesn’t it’s because shyness was never the problem at all there’s something else going on .
In 3rd grade everyone in my class was given awards for things they did or achieved. Mine was “award for getting out of your shell.” I know they meant to make me feel good about that but I was so embarrassed. Everyone else got rewards for good grades, being kind, being funny. Yet I got one for being “less shy.” No teacher fixed my ability to be social I had to do that myself.
Yeah, ands it’s always the teachers that don’t make their space comfortable to open up. That is why I liked my English teacher, very quiet room during lunch where you could talk she wouldn’t judge
It helped me get over my anxiety because of my stutter.
I have regular mental breakdowns at my school trying to talk to people and this shit absolutely does not help.
this fixed my shyness
Yes and no. Depends on how you do it. I would speak to them before class started, I told them I would call on them at around (10:30 for example) today and I would tell them the question and ask if they’re up to it. They say yes 90% of the time. It helps a lot but I guess it isn’t “forcing” now that I’ve written this all out
It absolutely does help, but only if done correctly. Making someone do it one time with no guidance doesn’t help. Regular public speaking will help
I think there’s a big chunk in the middle of these two things. People can be shy, and that can be okay. But it’s also okay to challenge yourself/be challenged, social interactions can be tough but you’ll only get worse by never trying. But you also shouldn’t force kids too much. Some just aren’t meant to be social butterflies. But learning how to talk to people even when you’re uncomfortable should be a skill people work on too.
I was bullied for being shy. I didn’t really hate when they made me speak, but I hated when I had to be in a group that clearly didn’t want me there and I was put in one out of pity
My science teacher was the best, I was one of those shy kids in school and when it was my turn to go up on the board he would make sure I would get the easier question (I was a bit stupider than the other kids) so that I wouldn’t be embarrassed in front of the whole class
I swear to the world, I remember back in middle school this one math teacher always pick on me. Even though, I never raise my hand. And when my voice shake, mf tell me why are you nervous, explain the step.
This meme hits me cause I used to be an outgoing kid but in middle school I got bullied a lot so I became shy but during after-school daycare I was forced to interact and play games with the kids who bullied me (not on purpose by the teachers, it’s just that the only kids in the group I was put it just happened to be the ones who were mean to me all day, and the teachers didn’t seem to catch on to why I wanted to read alone in the corner instead.)
I don’t know how you guys do it, but I literally got more scared and shy instead of actually fixing the problem
The concept of getting everyone involved is a good one. There’s a right and a wrong way to do it though.
Yeah and how about kids telling you “oh why dont you talk ????” And kids picning on you and the teacher not doing anythung about it 😾
Allowing shy children to sit quietly and not participate may make them comfortable, but leaves then woefully unprepared for real life (I know). Instead of “forcing” try “encouraging”.
i love how the scared ones just upvote the post and the comments are full of “brotha, you’re wrong”
Okay that is not completely true. Don’t force, but don’t top trying to get them to open up. Some just plain won’t without a bigger push though.
My hot take : life is constantly just doing things you don’t want to do. The kid needs to learn that sooner rather than later. Your interviewer won’t care if you’re shy, they just want the questions answered.
Shy kid here that was guided into and forced to socialize and give good presentations. It absolutely helped me with my anxiety longterm. Keeping people in bubbles doesnt help them. Stop it.
Forcing kids to talk?! 🤣🤣🤣 Oh the horror! 🙄
Hard pills to swallow: *this post is just wrong*
The teacher is still doing the right thing. When you enter the adult world, you can’t make the world adhere to your issues.