mom is always right
Wednesday, 12 Mar 2025
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That biker probably needed a drink after that.
When I was little I thought you could grow up to be an animal, like as a job. I planned to be an alligator.
Dumbest thing I believed as a child was that adults were smart.
My grandparents used to watch The Biggest Loser on TV a lot, so I grew up thinking “what do you weigh?” was a normal question to ask when meeting a new person.
I asked this to so many people before my parents finally got me to stop.
I mean. Did it work on you?
Tbh I feel like this one is 95% on the mom
My uncle was one of those bad ass bikers and he took me for a ride on his Harley once. We stopped at a service station and he said, “battery ain’t charging right.” I saw him go to a water fountain and get some water in a cup and pour it into the battery. My brain told me that batteries use acid. For the next several years I would not drink from fountains I was unfamiliar with because i had no idea how to tell which ones had water and which ones had battery acid.
See, now I’m going down the list of everyone I know with tattoos and realizing Mom might be right…
That poor dude
A colleague told her kid that only bad men drive motorcycles (she didn’t want him to like motorcycles). It all fell apart when she invited me over for dinner when I was visiting in town, and arrived at their front door in leathers with a Harley out front. I had no clue why the kid looked so shocked, scared and confused all at once, until his mom came to the door and had to explain it all to me 🤣
My dad told me that if I ate green beans then a beanstalk would grow in my stomach. He somehow thought that would encourage a toddler to eat them but instead I’ve sworn off green beans. It’s funny to watch my dad get scolded by my mom every thanksgiving when I skip over the green beans though.
When I was little I used to believe that it was illegal for cops to commit crimes
“I stabbed my mom so I can drive.”
My only dumb beliefs as a kid were monsters under the bed (still fucks me up if I consume horror before bed) and that milk substitutes as well as flavored milks were obtained by feeding the cow that specific food
That biker still thinks about that interaction.
My mum is welsh, doesn’t speak a word of welsh tho.
Young me, went to her to ask about welsh so I could tell my classmates in school.
She thought it would be funny to just fob me off with mispronounced words; I.e “toothbrush” as “toofbrush” yknow, exaggerated casual English.
Well needless to say, that caused massive trust issues as I went proudly into class to explain the basics of welsh, only to be absolutely rinsed by the smarter kids, and I went to defend my mother because of course I would!
She found the whole thing hilarious when I explained it to her when I got home, but for me it wasn’t a pleasant experience and was one of the few things that set up a deep distrust of whatever she would say in the future.
I guess my possible point is, yeah kids are stupid, but don’t play a joke at their expense because you cba to admit you don’t know something, or because you’re too immature to explain something to them in simple terms, you’d be surprised what they can pick up, but lying to them like that is just outright mean.😢
Cheers mum! 🙄🤣
Me .. a motorcycle rider with tattoos.. whose first tattoo was in memory of my dead mom .. lmao
Remember those Gusher commercials where the kid would eat one and their head would turn into a fruit?
I was terrified of even the thought of eating Gushers until around middle school.
I thought that as long as there was a movie I wanted to see, it would naturally be at the movie theater… everything I wanted to see was new so it always was in theaters. It wasn’t until I wanted to watch Peter Pan that I found out I was wrong and my little brain was so confused lol
Why parents lie to their children? Are they stupid?
When i was 5-6 I thought celebrities dont poop. I mean how could such popular people have to still deal with such gross shit everyday like common people.
This gave me an idea. My mom has dementia. I sent her a text asking her to draw me a picture that she wants me to see every day. When she sends it, I will have it tattooed on my forearm so I can see it every day.
This is funny. Thank you.
My mom told me if I ate a slice of boloney by itself (not on a sandwich), I’d get worms.
When my son was about 4 yo, he kept taking a marker and writing on himself.
Wife and I kept telling him not to write on himself.
I took him to the park one day and this HUGE muscular guy with arm tattoos walks by the swings.
My son walks up to him and says, **”You’re not supposed to write on yourself.”**
I thought he was gonna kill us both, but he just looked confused for a sec and kept walking.
I quit believing in God pretty early on and for some reason decided I believed that after we die, our spirits only get to visit/ see the stuff/places we’ve seen. So I would try to take quick looks around everywhere we went to “unlock” as much as possible “for later.”
Like, to be clear, if you went to a museum but didn’t enter some of the rooms, those wouldn’t be there later. Lol your limits are what you know.
My older sister told me that black olives were made from whale skin and chocolate milk came from mooses
Arthur Valentine…
One time I was just sitting there, dumb as hell. I got to pondering some of life’s greatest mysteries. What are hotdogs made from? I took in many great sources from my brain and came to the conclusion that they must be harvested from cow’s udders. The resemblance is uncanny and I took it as truth. I was horrified they would chop off a cows nipples and put them in packs for people to grill. Didn’t eat hotdogs for like 2 years
Our bus driver claimed adult bones were thicker and that’s why they didn’t need seat belts. Same goes for skull density and helmets.
Was sceptical , but went along with it….
My mum told me that babies come out of a mother’s belly button. It seemed like the most intuitive thing to believe as a child!