Processing (Part 3) – Gator Days (OC)
Wednesday, 12 Mar 2025
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I mentioned in comments for part 1 that this multiparter came about because of a recent real life experience. I’m someone who has trouble honoring my feelings when someone passes. I usually find myself thinking that I have to justify any sadness I’m experiencing. Part of my motivation for making these comics was to help get myself to point where I could respect the emotions that were coming up.
Grief is different for everyone. I don’t think there’s any sort of one size solution that magically makes everything better. But I have found that communication and emotional honesty has been a big help for myself. Thank you for reading.
Part 1
[https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/1j2ptjx/processing_part_1_gator_days_oc/](https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/1j2ptjx/processing_part_1_gator_days_oc/)
Part 2
[https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/1j481l7/processing_part_2_gator_days_oc/](https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/1j481l7/processing_part_2_gator_days_oc/)
I’m glad after realizing he doesn’t really know if his dad is actually OK, august decides to be honest in an age appropriate way to gustopher. Gustopher is so expressive. I hope he doesn’t change that too much as he grows up.
I’m adding this guy to my shrine about great masculine figures.
>Gustopher: “Oh . . . Are you ok?
I don’t think I would have ever asked my father what his feelings were when I was growing up. My parents were super-beings, who were always right, and always knew what was best. How could they possibly have feelings?
I’ve actually experienced this scenario. I talked to our custodian a couple of times, and he was a really nice guy. He had a heart attack and died while cleaning the bathrooms, one of our managers found him. It’s a weird feeling trying to figure out how to feel when someone you’ve seen every day for 3 years and talked to less than 30 minutes dies.
Your comics have always been lovely, and this is no different. The topic feels difficult to discuss – like, you have to feel justified in feeling sad? Despite already feeling it? But you don’t have to meet some kind of criteria. You aren’t filling a form to get permission to be sad, and you especially shouldn’t have to for your own mind. ~~(Not gonna lie, this is something I still grapple with.)~~
The last panel sums it up beautifully. Thanks for sharing with us.
At the start of my career in chemical manufacturing, there was this crusty old farm that somehow took a shine to my 20 year old dumbass self. He could be a ball of barbed wire some days (Vietnam messed him up), but he looked out for me.
One Friday, thanks to 2008, I get the axe. The last of three people hired, the one with the least time at the company.
I lucked out in being able to come back to work in the lab the following Tuesday, with the chance to continue with the company when it moves to Ohio (yuck).
Almost at the point of shutdown, I was getting some supplies for the lab and my crusty mentor flags me down and asked if I’d be in the meeting about a job offer. I was never told about this meeting, since management only told the floor employees. After he cursed management, he told me when and where to be.
That gesture got me a job at another site with a 50% raise. I’d always meant to visit him after he retired, but time slipped by. I found out two years too late that he’d already passed.
I still regret not getting to know him better and I owe him eternally for making sure I was included. The job is pretty easy, and I’ve finished a few years having made 100k.
I think about him often.
Im glad hes open and honest with his kid about his thoughts and feelings
I wish my dad was open like this when I was growing up.
Now that is how you do it. Let it out, & speak to the little one with respect about it too. Now he is learning how to be a good dad in the future. Great lesson here. Keep it up Op!
My dad always said to me that he cried a lot, just like me, but I never saw it. I never really believed him. August telling his son that he’s feeling sad, right there, is such a big deal to me. Kids need to know their parents are just as human as they are and have the same feelings.
I work in HR and we have lost 3 employees in the past year (nothing work related). I feel this very much.
Authors barely disguised trauma.
Love your art btw 🧡
jerry garcia, died in 2018 while testing out a new scooter. i worked with him briefly at a glass polishing company up in maine USA. he was 19 and was set to join the united states marine corps super soon. myself having just gotten out of the army not even a year earlier, it was exciting seeing someone else about to embark on the same journey as me. RIP jerry. gone but not forgotten
I love the panel 2 to 3 transition. August came within inches of saying “I’m fine” when he realized that he was doing and course corrected. Amazing detail, as he realizes he was doing exactly what his own father did.
Hot dang, even in your sad stories, these are a welcome sight.
There was a man named Ernest Levert Jr, who was a community organizer and ran an organization in Columbus, Ohio, called the Royal Oak Initiative. It was a chess program, bringing people together and bringing chess to people who would otherwise not have much opportunity to play.
He suffered an aneurysm and passed away suddenly this year. I think he was in his early 30s. I barely knew him, but I knew he was a great man, very generous with his time and his effort. It felt very strange and unfair that this should happen to someone like that.
Like you’ve discussed, I felt like I was not entitled to grieve him as much as I did since I’d only had a handful of conversations with him. But it’s just a really strange thing.
Thank you for making these comics.
Damn, I love how well you use pauses and panels with no dialogue to add weight to the key moments. It’s like seeing the characters process the situations in real time.
Sometimes the floor we have to sit on is the floor in our heart
Happened to me. He was a forklift operator and was fired (his fault entirely). He relied on our companies insurance for his insulin and it was clear that he wasn’t getting it after he was fired. He died shortly after because he couldn’t afford to take care of himself.
This is the realest
I wish I could talk to my dad like that. Absolutely adore your comics!
My uncle (basically) passed about two weeks ago. He was mainly my business partner, but he mentored my late husband (his nephew) and I. I was absolutely shocked about his death because he was in great shape.
Someone said it best on here. We mourn the lost opportunities as well. I hate that I am going to miss out on him teaching me more. I have wondered who feels the same August does towards my uncle. He knew a lot of people and everyone thought so highly of him.
At my first job there was a young coworker lady that looked sickly and had to be let back home frequently, not long after she was found dead at her home… dead from gas leak poisoning, sometimes indicators are plain to see but we ignore them. Check your home for leaks, folks.
I love the third panel the wtf happened look in daddy gators eyes, I can absolutely relate….
If my kid asked if I was ok I’d probably break down lol
What do we say to generational trauma? “Not today”
I’ve just discovered this comic and I love it. Does anyone know if the artist has published it as a book or if they’re planning on doing so anytime soon?
This hits very close to my second home, the workplace. We’ve had a number of passing aways recently and it’s such a breath of fresh air to know that we as humans care about others, it’s natural, enough hate!
Narrator: “Little did August know that Jeff had the largest collection in the world of Rule 34. It was this collection that caused ChatGPT upon achieving the singularity to launch the nukes to destroy the world.” /s
In all seriousness, this comic got me re-thinking about the perception of the self that I had been grappling with since I lost my brother. How one is thought of and remembered by others is something one will never know. There are four forms of the self. One is the self the individual knows and lets others see. Another is the self that the individual knows but does not let others see. Third is the self that the individual does not know but is seen by others. Lastly, there is the self that is exists that is not seen by the individuals or others. Perception of reality is a hell of a socially constructed thing. For example, as readers we only see a form of Stuart that is seen by August that is allowed to be shown from Stuart which makes him seem like an annoying office manager. We as readers know nothing of Stuart outside of the office and since this comic primarily revolves around August and Gustopher, there is a side we may never see of Stuart since he seems to keep things professional and formal.
Reminder: It’s 👏 okay 👏 to 👏 have 👏 feelings
Still surprisingly topical for me
This was wonderful